I'm happy today. I can say this is the happiest day of this year to date.
Nothing big happened, it does not take alot for a person to feel happy.
It all started when my lessons ended early due to the cancellation of econs tutorial. As I was walking to the bus stop from school I asked myself a question, " What are my dreams? Where is the person who dreamt of so many things?" I realised that for these few days or rather this period of time, I lost my dreams. I was becoming rather irritable and seeing the darker side of the world more than anything else. It's depressing. Growing up seems to have nothing good as it seems to reveal all those dark sides. Then I suddenly remembered that: Hey! My dream is to backpack around the world and one day if I can, I hope to go back to Dabo village in yunnan. Then I started to enjoy the sweltering sun rays.
I bought my lovely jap pizza at the pasar malam and xiang chang 2(note: this is not a sausage but a stuffed keychain) It was then that I saw my world in the light I saw them in sec 3,4 and j1. I guess the workload of year 2 has been too stiffling with the accumulating pressures that happiness just didn't fit in. Also, freedom seems all the more sweet and precious when you're deprived of it. Haha. This is the short few hours that I can relax and do whatever I want before studying for the test tmr. I realised how much I missed doing whatever I wanted right on the spot. Last year, I still had spare time to take the bus back to woodlands from amk for 1 hour. It's not like I can't take it this year but whenever I felt like doing that, whenever the urge comes out to follow my own heart for some thinking time, my brain tells me that I've to get home in the shortest time and get down to studying. That's the difference.
此刻我觉得喜悦从我心中满溢出来。我追求的快乐就是跟随自己的心，做我要做的事。快乐不需要大笑嬉闹，只要一颗明亮的心。我感谢主。
A few days before I was feeling rather displeased with my attitude towards life. I prayed for God to help me, to let go of all that I clinged on to- the inequalities and unfairness I felt. I kept struggling. I felt that I couldn't let go no matter how I told myself. After I let my mind rest for a while, I suddenly felt like I could do it. God has definitely helped me in doing what I couldn't. Thank you God:)
It's been so long since I'm at eased. Being alone let's me listen to what my heart has to say. Only when I am willing and at eased in being alone that I can find happiness.
that is nice to know that my friend!!(:i'm getting always happy when i hear tt you are happy!!missed ya so much!muacks:**
wo ai ni
Posted by: Arzu | 04/23/2009 at 06:21 PM
that is nice to know tt my friend!i'm always getting happy when you feel happy^^missed ya so much!
Posted by: Arzu | 04/23/2009 at 06:24 PM
黄小鬼！u bought another xiang chang? haha, be careful worrs! later i eat xiang chang 2 up as well. MUAHAHA. anyway, good to know u are feeling good. i very sad cos i got a long day in school today. and papa jonathan let us off late today. BWAWAWAWAWA
Posted by: LAO YING (GRILLED TOTORO) | 04/23/2009 at 10:35 PM
arzu: Aww my friend i miss you too! it's been some time since we wrote to each other or talked :( be happy too my dear, love you lots <3
laoying: haha ya! i'll not let u lay ur hands on him!! haha, but u can have small bite on xiang chang one cos u've had a hard day:) hug hug!
Posted by: Ham | 04/23/2009 at 11:35 PM
LOL. i din even get to bite xiang chang 2 at all cos someone's been keeping him away from me the entire day ><. oh wells, at least i get to bite xiang chang 1 :D HAHA, I WANT TO BITE ALL THE XIANG CHANGS IN THE WORLD. <3
Posted by: LAO YING (GRILLED TOTORO) | 04/24/2009 at 06:07 PM
WELL.. you greedy totoro, u got to bite xiang chang 1 and I crrrrryyyyy for him T_T stupid girl! haha. make me so tired in class after defending all ur evil tactics to lay ur hands on xiang chang 2 =__=
Posted by: Ham | 04/24/2009 at 10:05 PM
haha, it was fun to see u got crazzzzzyyyyy wad!! HAHA. LETS DO IT AGN ON MONDAY! YAY~
Posted by: LAO YING (GRILLED TOTORO) | 04/25/2009 at 12:34 PM